Radically given to Christ

This summer our church is spending time in the book of Proverbs. I've heard verses out of this book for practically my whole life...but this summer, God's opened my eyes, and really my heart, to what he desires for my life. To anyone who knows me even remotely well, you know that for as long as I can remember, I've had a dream of someday becoming a wife and mother. Waiting for that has been an extremely challenging struggle, one that I've had to combat every day. Although I've valued my relationship with Jesus, I've put a lot of my focus on being the material of a "good wife". Sometimes I get frustrated and even angry when I find myself still single. These are my weakest human moments because I start to doubt and question what God's plan for me really is. I know that He is the one who has given me these desires, but then the enemy, just like with Eve in the garden, causes me to doubt God's greatness and ignore all the blessings I have today. Through this series on Proverbs, I'm challenged to not work towards being a "good wife", but that my focus should be on becoming a godly woman. Because, if I'm not a godly woman, and my focus is not solely on fulfilling the purpose God has for my life, than I am worth nothing as a wife and mother. This dream and desire that God planted in me so long ago is still very alive in my heart. But apart from that, God has challenged me to grow as a woman. He has given me little reminders here and there, and reaffirmed my dreams which has renewed my hope for the future. Ultimately, this season is about me. And God of course. If I cannot be confident in the woman I was created to be, and place my life fully in God's very capable hands...than I am no good to a man or any other person in my life. God chose me...HE CHOSE ME! I cannot even begin to wonder what amazing plans He has for me, but I'm relinquishing any hold I have on trying to make things happen for myself. I want to be a godly woman. Whenever God allows me to meet my future husband, I know that it will be far greater than anything I could make happen on my own. It will be the perfect timing because it was orchestrated by God himself. I trust that in this season of singleness, God is working in my life to prepare me to be the best I can be. And I can also trust and pray that my future husband is seeking God in becoming a godly man, so that one day he can be a godly husband and father. It's hard. Most days I can't find the motivation to read God's Word, or spend meaningful time talking with Him. But overall, every day, I'm striving to become a better woman, a godly woman.

I want to...

• Know my purpose
• Trust in His Word and know that He is intimately involved in every part of my life
• Have assurance that God does not fail and does not bring harm
• Be bold in my approach to fulfilling God's will in my life
• Demonstrate joy, peace and strength in difficult times
• Have courage to be who God created me to be
• Desire to receive vision from God for my future

I want to be a woman who is radically given to Christ.